Frequently Asked Forum Questions
 Search the HBO News Archives

Any All Exact 
Search the Halo Updates DBs

BWU Halo Halo2 
Search Older Posts on This Forum:
Posts on Current Forum | Archived Posts

View Thread Reply Return to Index Set Prefs Previous Next
Re: Gender expectations
By:Cody Miller
Date: 3/20/14 5:30 pm
In Response To: Re: Gender expectations (Grizzlei)

: Yes, they're healthy traits in their own right, but they exist and are
: perpetuated as the ideal which masculine individuals have to aspire to in
: spite of men who fall "out of the box" and femininity.

Perhaps these traits should be something EVERYONE aspires to then?

: Strong and Tall takes into account a man's belief that he must be the
: strongest, opposed to weak and minuscule which they would attribute to a
: woman.

I'm not sure men think women are weak, simply weaker. I think the difference is pretty important.

: Girls like him is pure
: and simple heteronormativity, the belief that heterosexuality is the norm
: and all other sexual orientations are set apart and made secondary.

I know a lot of gay men, and let me tell you, women DO love them :-p

: These traits are just as harmful to the boys who zealously adhere to them
: into their adulthood as they are to those boys who have no desire or
: capability, and to the girls which these boys try their damndest to
: separate themselves from.

Again, I am not sure any of these are harmful. Anybody who adopts them is going to be a more complete happy human being.

: As someone who was raised as a boy for much of their childhood (well they
: tried), I know full well how dangerous these traits can be to a young
: person. I've always been a very feminine person, and despite being a bit
: of a tomboy, my personality never attempted to latch onto the traits in
: this box. Because of that, I typically found myself on the sides of that
: slide. I was very hesitant to do anything or seek confrontation (Backs
: Down), I was super awkward, and easily upset. Oh, yeah, and totally like a
: girl. Can't forget that one.

: Anyhoo, my dad tried his hardest to inspire me to be a guy like him and his
: efforts never caught on. I knew from an early age that being a feminine
: boy was something that dearly set me apart from my male peers. At this
: time I hadn't realized that I was really a girl or that transgender was
: even a thing, so fitting into being "just another guy" was
: something I tried to do simply so I'd stop receiving so much unwanted
: angst and criticism. Even though I tried, it never worked because they
: kept seeing me as weak or "like a girl." My parents and little
: brother eventually stopped bothering trying to make me into a typical boy
: and just let me be whoever I was because they knew it would never happen.

The problem we have is simply the fact that so many feminine traits are in fact undesirable, yet we expect women to conform to them. If we simply expect both men and women to adopt the healthiest traits, while still allowing for differences between the sexes, everybody would be a lot happier and healthier.

For instance being confident and decisive are masculine traits, while being demure is a feminine one. We should be encouraging both men and women to be decisive and confident, and nobody to be demure. Instead of embracing demure women, we should reject them, similar to how we reject demure men. In this sense, a demure man isn't failing to live up to his gender expectation, he is failing to live up to his expectation as a human being.

Messages In This Thread

Gender expectationsCody Miller3/20/14 4:22 am
     Nail. Head. *NM*The Loot3/20/14 4:37 am
     Re: Gender expectationsKal3/20/14 10:24 am
           Re: Gender expectationsXenos3/20/14 11:41 am
                 Re: Gender expectationsKal3/20/14 11:55 am
                       Re: Gender expectationsXenos3/20/14 2:00 pm
           +1Arithmomaniac3/20/14 12:09 pm
     Re: Gender expectationsGrizzlei3/20/14 2:38 pm
           Re: Gender expectationsCody Miller3/20/14 5:30 pm
                 Response: Now with 1x more *GIF*Grizzlei3/20/14 6:24 pm
                       That last paragraphZackDark3/20/14 6:53 pm
                             Re: That last paragraphGrizzlei3/20/14 7:01 pm
                                   Re: That last paragraphZackDark3/20/14 10:18 pm
                       Re: Response: Now with 1x more *GIF*Cody Miller3/20/14 8:21 pm
                             Re: Response: Now with 1x more *GIF*Kal3/20/14 8:30 pm
                                   Re: Response: Now with 1x more *GIF*Cody Miller3/20/14 8:47 pm
                             Re: Response: Now with 1x more *GIF*Grizzlei3/20/14 9:06 pm
                                   Input from the fly on the wallSonofMacPhisto3/21/14 11:20 am
                                         Re: Input from the fly on the wallThe Loot3/22/14 7:46 pm

Sign up to post.

You will only be able to post to the forum if you first create a user profile.
If, however, you already have a user profile, please follow the "Set Preferences" link on the main index page and enter your user name to log in to post.