: Well, there was this guy named Wyrd, and he like, created
: all the shite, and had this son, Segoth, but then this
: other guy came along and chopped off Segoth's head,
: and down on the planet there was this good hero and
: bad hero, and they made this thing called the cycle,
: and one kills the other alternately every thousand
: years, and there was a good dude called Teriecies
: (sp?), and he got killed by the leveler, who is a big
: evil transient divinity, and then he was reborn as an
: evil d00d, Moagim, who was killed by this light hero
: Connacht, but then Connacht like, vanished, and came
: back as Balor, and destroyed a buncha stuff, and the
: light found this disembodied head, which was kinda
: creepy, out in the desert, and it had them go do stuff
: like get the total codex, which is a big book with the
: fate of every living being written in it, and then
: they went and got the watcher's arm, and you kinda
: think about how people seem to lose a lot of their
: body parts in this game, and archers make arrowheads
: out of the bone from his arm, and shoot him with it,
: and he turns to stone, and a buncha zerks run up and
: kill him, or not, that's still kinda in debate, and
: then Alric gets kidnapped, and taken out to the
: desert, and some heroes rescue him, and he kills
: Sinis, a shade, and then they're in forest heart, and
: they're KIKING TRO ASS MB, but Soulblighter comes in
: and pulls them all into the tain, which is this portal
: to a mirror universe, and they run around in caves
: like total blundering IDJITS, but they find a way out,
: by shattering the tain, and then the dwarves fight to
: retake one of their towns, and then they all go north,
: and Balor threatens you, and then Alric manages to get
: an Eblis stone, which is a magical thingamajig, and it
: gave him all the power he needed to kill Balor, but
: then they needed to chuck his head into the great
: devoid or else he would come back to life, god knows
: why, but Soulblighter was waiting for you there, and
: almost stopped you, unless you suck at playing myth,
: in which case, he DID stop you and you never finished
: the solo scenario, but he turns into crows and flies
: away just as this HUGE-ASS explosion shoots up outta
: the devoid, and then it's like, 60 years later, and
: Soulblighter is back, and the whole game is pretty
: much running around trying to kill him, and you get to
: meet the Deceiver, who's this fallen lord who's still
: alive, and shiver, who's ugly as a water buffalo who's
: drunk outta the wrong water hole too many times,
: because Soulblighter resurrected her with tramist's
: mirror, which is this magical artifact, and the
: Deceiver and shiver have a showdown, and shiver goes
: BOOM and blows herself and the Deceiver apart, leaving
: your hopelessly mortal guys to find their way back OUT
: of the desert, not to mention what they just went
: through to get INTO it, but then Alric, who's still
: alive, finds Soulblighter, and traps him inside this
: volcano, and you gotta go all the way around this
: spiral thing while getting yer butt whooped, and when
: you get to Soulblighter, Alric stands there and plays
: with his magic cigarette lighter while you try to
: fight off hordes of fetch and kryds, and you sit there
: and get your butt kicked until Alric decides that he
: can FINALLY kill Soulblighter, and then Soulblighter
: falls into this big pool of lava, and then the volcano
: starts to erupt, and when you think about it, your
: dudes would be turned into "leg of fried
: derf", because you need to go all the way back
: DOWN the spiral while the lava is coming UP, but Alric
: still survives anyway, since he's the hero, and they
: all sit around dumbly and watch the volcano erupt, and
: think of how purty the clouds are, and then a wild
: kryd comes up and eats you. At least in my book.
: -Joy's really pooped alter ego
The d00ds in the volcano didn't die, as is shown by Mr. Narrator Man's Epilouge thingie, although he sustained "Many Wounds".
