In Response To: Halo 4 Helmet Guide IMG *Updated* (nillapuddin)
The helmets as I see them...
Recruit - It's a good thing you apparently start with it, because I might never choose anything else.
Warrior - Reminds me of the 80's and early 90's GI Flat-top haircut. I've grown used to it's ugliness. I no longer want to gouge my eyes out.
Air Assault - Looks about the same aside from getting the "excessive details" treatment.
Soldier - This one is bald, spent too much time staring at the sun, and had lemons for lunch.
Aviator - Kanye West with a gas mask.
Defender - Looks like he has blinders on, and kept forgetting he had a helmet on when he went to pinch the bridge of his nose.
Recon - Like Air Assault. "Excessive details" treatment.
EVA - In Reach if you went Up Armored you got a sweatband. In Halo 4, you get headphones.
War Master - Someone decided a good visor would be a mold of a gorilla's face. God only knows why.
Scout - Yep. Still ugly. Props for not giving it the "excessive details" treatment though.
Orbital - More headphones and a skull. Because everyone likes seeing all the dudebros wearing the same friggin' thing.
Infiltrator - Also known as "My First 3D Model" due to excessive details and polys. Also known as "Someone Punched My Tin Can Hat In The Face".
Hazop - Looks like he rides the Short Bus.
EOD - Looks like really shitty CGI cinematics from the early 90s.
Oceanic - Because why not have a reference to a five year old game that has nothing at all to do with Halo.
Enforcer - He's mad. Probably because someone punched him in the face.
Wetwork - So his head's a tennis ball with razor blades attached to it? And what the hell is with that absolutely useless visor? Does he see with his nose?
Operator - It's Security, only not. Actually I kinda like it, but it doesn't matter, because I'll more than likely never get it.
Pioneer - I don't even know what's going on here. Excessive details, visors that don't make sense, "My First 3D Model"... Seriously, what the hell is that? I defy you to tell me that makes any logical sense as a piece of military headgear in ANY time period.
Pathfinder - Angles. We needed a LOT more angles. Also, the mouth of an elder person who isn't wearing their dentures.
Engineer - I'm not sure what's going on here, but if you replaced what I'm assuming is a mount with four cameras on it with an actual visor, that'd probably look just fine.
Stalker - It looks like a fat midget head. Also creepy. Like I'd imagine a stalker to be. So... good work?
Rogue - Look! Another helmet that's actually kinda normal and good! I think it's ugly and suffering, again, from detail overload, but hey! Points for something normal.
Tracker - We took CIO's little brother and stuffed him into a tactical helmet, then welded them together.
Vanguard - .... It's like Pathfinder, only somehow... more bizarre. Is it for Cyclops? Is it a nightlight? Do the other Spartan IVs need him in order to sleep easy at night? What the hell was the thought process?
CIO - Because Splinter Cell.
Venator - Because Dead Space.
Gungnir - Same as Reach, more or less. More rounded. Thought it was ugly in Reach, but original. Seeing as how nothing has really changed, it's ok.
Commando - He carries a gas rank on his head.
Ranger - Seriously? You were so out of ideas for helmets, you made a cylinder and tarted it up?
Protector - His helmet is ironic, because he was really bad at protecting his eyes. You can tell. They're empty sockets now. Also he's sucking on a pacifier.
Mark VI - You know why it looks weird? It's slightly too wide. But that isn't the main reason, the main reason is it's quite literally one of only 3 or 4 helmets that are simple and haven't been detailed and poly-ed up into oblivion. How absurd is that?
Raider - I heard you liked samurais and kabuki warriors and dragons?
Deadeye - So named because he can't see. Also it looks like someone took an axe to his helmet.
Locus - Because Doom and Gears of War. God only knows why we're referencing all this other video games, but obviously we don't have enough of them.
Scanner - He'll make sure you don't copy that floppy. He literally has he eye on you.
Strider - This would be ok, if it didn't look like a one man submersible, or like someone had squashed the poor Spartan's head to fit inside it because of the awkwardly shaped visor.
FOTUS - I just.... the fact this is even a thing is stupid.
Look, now that we've gotten a really good look at all these armors, I'll admit they aren't all the waste bin rejects they looked like they should be. That by no means, however, means they're good. I still think they're all absolutely abysmal choices, lacking in originality and imagination. I mean seriously, just look at how many video game reference helmets we have. We needed those? Really? How long did it take to think those up? Two minutes? And my god, the amount of excessive details. Every little tiny thing... It's ridiculous. What happened to the clean lines of the past? And crap like Infiltrator? It really does look like someone's first 3D model to me. I'm taking a 3D modeling class right now, and it looks exactly like some of the student work that I see daily. It looks like some of MY work when it's just not quite right. It's like the dude who made this, couldn't stop extruding, editing vertices, and adding more polys. And Pioneer... I just... WHAT IS THAT? It's like a Covenant Drop Pod learned what tie-dye was and the entire process went horribly wrong and then some fashion challenged Spartan decided it was perfect headgear. And since we're on the subject of things not making sense... DEM VISORS. Ok... Sure. Let's use the "There's camera's on the outside projecting an image inside" explanation. I'll roll with that. Gungnir does it, and I'm cool with it. But if you have cameras outside the helmet, WHAT IS WITH THE ILLOGICALLY PLACED VISORS THAT DON'T DO ANYTHING. It doesn't compute.
Ugh... So no... They aren't all waste bin rejects, but most of them are still fantastically bad, and some of them just don't make any friggin' sense and make me want to punch a puppy. I don't understand how a game can look so gorgeous and so amazingly bad at the same time.
I'm sorry. I needed to get this out of my system.
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